favorite season transition

humility

seasons of change

i know that i am going to sound completely ridiculous to all of you especially considering my last blog but know that i am going through a season of change and this season of change has not been easy by any stretch of the imagination. the process has been painful as the leaves that i love are slowly separating from my tree and falling onto the ground...as the winter brings chills to my branches but I know that HE is always good and faithful and I will rest in His never ending love and never ending provision.

i have full heartedly decided not to go back to Australia. WHAT?? you might be thinking....didn't God tell you to go??? didn't God give you peace about going and sticking to what He told you before??? how can at one point God say GO and now He is saying STAY???

i don't have all the exact words to tell each one of you how i came to this decision. i don't know how to explain how at one point i can have peace about going and the next moment not having peace but i know that right now at this moment the decision to stay has given me complete peace and joy.

i know many of you are probably doubting that God spoke to me before or doubting that He is speaking to me now but i know with all of my heart that He does speak to me. He speaks to me completely differently than each one of you and He takes me through these crazy pathways in order for me to clearly hear his voice. my friend kris reminded me that He speaks to my heart, He knows my personal and unique language and he created me to hear him in very specific ways...and... I HAVE HEARD!

i hate that means that i won't be seeing a lot of you that i had been planning on for quite a while now. i hate that i have probably disappointed you...my heart hurts that i will not be returning but my heart would also have hurt when if had gone and should of stayed.

God spoke to Abraham to sacrifice his son Isaac. God also spoke to Abraham not to sacrifice his son Isaac. it is about the process and the journey more so than the location or the action of following through. it is all about seeking his will for us each day.

i am sorry to each one of you that have banked on me going. i love you all so much. thank you for being apart of this process with me and praying for me, helping provide for me and encouraging me.

leaving this month

i can't believe it is almost time for me to depart this most beautiful state. time has been going by so fast and i can't believe this is the month i will be leaving.

i don't know if some of you know but i was having problems with getting my visa which has been a big challenge for me. immigration will randomly select people to get a medical backrounds and i was one of them that was selected which delays my visa and costs me money that i don't have. i have a friend who applied the same day and she has already received her visa which is a little disheartening. since hearing that she had received hers and i haven't received mine, i was sure i wasn't going to get my visa. i started planning other options without trusting God but relying on what i know to be true.

i was starting to get excited about these other plans and then i was reminded by my other family to stay strong in what God has called me to do. He has called me back and He will provide! I emailed the base where i will be going and they said from the time they receive my health information it will be 2-3 weeks...which means that i would most likely get my visa the day before i am scheduled to leave. man!! that really makes it so i have to rely on God and not myself.

"Look to the Lord and HIS STRENGTH; seek His face always."
ps 105:4

pray with me please that God would provide me with my visa and that all my finances will come together.